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We had a scary couple weeks. My husband got sick. Really sick. Vomiting, nausea, weight loss, lethargic, and then he turned yellow.. like a damn banana. We went from instacare, to emergency and were terrified. His liver wasn’t working…we didn’t say it out loud but we were waiting for the “C” word. He had all the signs and symptoms of liver cancer.

My heart was breaking. I was terrified. I kept thinking “I’m going to be a widow”. This is what til death feels like. 

After a million tests he was diagnosed with hepatitis A. Which is the first thing we asked them to test for, and we’re ignored.

I am raising holy hell with the hospital. 

Needless to say I haven’t had time to write. He is on the mend, thankfully but this has changed our lives. One of us will die, it’s inevitable. How do we live our lives knowing this?

We’ve realized that nothing is important. No possession, not our home, nothing.

Which is good, because our hospital bills may break us. It doesn’t matter, we’ll sell our house if we have to, and actually we were planning that anyway. No one needs a mortgage this large, nor a home this big. This house is wonderful, I love it. At this point life insurance and health insurance has to be the priority, and like a lot of others affording a home and all the bills that come with it make those two things restrictive. Being self employed pushes health care costs to around $450.00 a month. Who can afford that? 

In the USA these are the hard Choices we must make, food and shelter or health insurance, and before everyone gets on their high horse and says I just need to prioritize and quit buying avacado toast, I say no. How much avacado toast adds up to $450.00 a month? I don’t like that particular food item anyhow.

My big splurge? Fresh squeezed apple juice. Sue me.

Anyhoo I’m grateful for friends who’ve been so kind and supportive. People have pitched in by purchasing paintings, bringing food over, and most of all just listening. We’ll figure it out, I can now see that there’s a lot of people one medical emergency from being homeless, we are fortunate we’ll be ok. 

I’m not even going to get on the fact that the bumbling aholes in Washington give no shits about the health of their citizens.

I will gladly pay more taxes to live in a country where we take care of one another when in need.

That’s all I have for today, hopefully I’m back to writing regularly.