It has been a crazy summer. Everything has come in tens. My roof falling in, my husband getting sick, debt up to my eyeballs, family stress…
A bright light in all of this is that my nephew has moved in with us for a while. It’s been a long time since I’ve had a 14 year old in the house. I am trying to help his father out, and get him back on track.
…and all of a sudden I’m over everything else…
I’m human, so my sense of self importance takes over a lot of the time. Social media spurns this on more often than not.
I post my little thoughts here..but really, is it important? Am I changing anyone’s life? Or is it all about me and my need to vent?
I post random shit on Facebook..but really does anyone care about my day? Or is it boredom and narcissism?
I post my paintings on IG…but really, how much am I really selling? Am I showing off to no one?
I’m over it. And honestly besides my love for reading on this platform, your words..I don’t pay much attention to others posts..I’m simply too busy, and lately the negativity is rampant.
Family tends to put what is valuable into perspective. This perfect, smart, articulate, funny, damaged little human in my home puts it all into perspective.
I haven’t had much motivation for the last couple years. Some of that stems from depression over my empty nest, I don’t know what to do with myself, so I tend to waste a lot of time on my phone as a distraction.
I am starting to think about how self important, how absolutely self involved, how egotistical it all is. It’s exhaustive. No one cares about my self serving bs…
The busier I get caring for and loving the people surrounding me, the less important my online persona becomes.
I like writing, I’m not sure how good at it I am, and if I’m being honest I like ya’all reading it, I like the feedback, and I’m going to continue because I feel like it’s healing, cathartic, but everything else is washing away as I become more focused on reality. It will be less frequent, but I’m going to try to keep this blog active.
Teenagers as everyone knows are a full time job, I have no clue how I did this with 3. I was younger I suppose.
One thing is for certain though, I’ll end up getting more out of this than he will. I feel blessed.